I know what you’re thinking. “Three-and-a-half weeks with no posts and this is what he comes back with?!?”
(But you can’t say this isn’t the most appropriate use of this category yet!)
Okay, so if you haven’t freaked out and clicked off to somewhere else at this point, you probably want to know what the hell I’m talking about.
Just what the title says.
I don’t think my bisexuality has been any big secret (certianly not if you’ve read this site for any length of time), but I’ve never delved too much into specifics about what I’m into.
Especially when it comes to kink.
And some of you might be thinking, “why the hell’d you decide to open up now?”
Now, it’s not entirely his fault. But a recent post of his really got me thinking. Why do so many blogs suck? What are they missing? Why can’t they be more intersting, and make me want to read more of what this person has to say?
He’s come up with a list of 14 things that could make blogs more interesting. I don’t think mine is all that dull, but I really haven’t been inspired to write much lately. I’ve made lots of titles and thought of stuff to write about, but I’ve just not been doing it.
Time to fix that.
If I were going to peg this entry (no pun intended) to one of Steve’s points, it’d probably have to be #5 – actual experiences.
I know that writing this breaks with his call for anonymity, but hey – that’s my call. I don’t want this to be some freakishly anonymous blog. I think it’s more interesting to read things you never knew before about people you already know than about strangers. The connection makes you take another look at them and yourself, and the dynamic between yourselves.
I dig that.
Now, back to the subject of this post.
A lot of guys are scared of their own asses.
Not in the way that chicks fear theirs (mostly with regards to size, and whether or not said size is increasing), but regarding anything penetrating the aforementioned ass. Hell, most guys wince at the mere suggestion of anything making backdoor entry.
Now, it’s not for everybody, but to not even try it is just being silly. I guess maybe they’re scared they might like it. That’s probably a bigger fear than the act itself. If they never try it, they can remain “secure” in their masculinity. As horrified as they’d be to tell their buddies a chick slipped a finger in during a blowjob one time, imagine the gut-wrenching (again, no pun intended) terror of having such an experience – and wanting it again!
But say you try it, and do like it. What then?
Well, if it was like the “finger during oral” scenario, you may be curious for more. You may want a second finger. Hell, you may want a third! (Remember the dude in Road Trip?)
Or you may want even more.
This is probably a tricky decision for a guy to make. Say he’s straight, but really digs it when his girl plays with his ass. She’s gotten up to three fingers in there and it drives him wild. (She probably gets off on it a bit too, especially if he reacts really well to it.) Toys (dildo, vibe, plug, etc.) would be the next step. Still “safe” as it’s just a chick playing with his ass. Not gay at all in his mind.
But say he wants her to strap one on?
That’s where confusion really sets in. It’s no longer safe, as she’s not just going to be playing with his ass.
She’s going to be fucking it.
And everybody knows straight guys don’t get fucked in the ass.
No? Why the hell not?
It’s not a guy taking his ass. It’s a girl. A girl who really cares about making him feel good. So much, in fact, that she’ll get into seriously new territory with him.
And even better, she’s not going to get greedy.
When a guy’s fucking your ass, he may be thinking about how it feels for you. But what’s his mind really on? Getting off! He’s a guy, for fuck’s sake. He’s not going to devoting a lot of his attention to how good it is for you. He’s chasing down his own orgasm. If you get one along the way, that’s nice – but it’s not his primary concern.
A girl, on the other hand, is going to take a much different approach. She’s going to see just how good she can make you feel. She wants to know what sounds she can get out of you. She’s eager to find out how hard you’ll come. When a girl’s fucking your ass, it’s all about you.
And isn’t that what guys want out of sex?
Don’t deny it. Don’t sit there thinking, “not me, Drew. I care about my partner’s pleasure.” Yes, I’m sure you do. But sometimes you wish the focus could be on making you feel as good as possible. And maybe you get pretty close to that sometimes. But I question whether or not you’ve had an experience where her pleasure didn’t even enter into it.
I’ll bet you’d like one.
Here’s another good reason to have a chick take the reins (so to speak) back there.
She’s probably better at it than some (or a lot) of guys.
Her equipment may be an aftermarket add-on instead of a factory-installed component, but that doesn’t mean she doesn’t know how to use it. Precisely because of the reason I mentioned above (the whole “it’s all about you” thing), girls can be much better at fucking ass than guys. They’ll want to try more positions, do it longer, and put a lot more effort into it than most guys.
(I’m not saying all guys suck at topping – but some of them are damned horrid.)
If you’re a straight (or bi) guy curious about what it’d be like to get topped, you’re probably better off asking a girl to do it than a guy. This may sound like odd advice, but believe me, you’ll thank me if you go for it. There’s really just one question you have to ask.
Are you man enough to get fucked in the ass? ^.^